I would like to introduce a technique that we use in compassion-focused therapy sessions.

Although safest in a therapeutic relationship, this technique can also be used at home as an individual practice. It is important, however, that if it provokes a deep experience that upsets you, you seek out a professional or at least a family member or good friend who can listen you with compassion.

This technique is a combination of a psychodramatic exercise with specific elements of compassion-focused therapy. It starts from the premise that there are multiple voices within us, and these inner voices can be personified. This does not mean that we struggle with multiple personalities or split consciousness; the complexity of our inner selves is a feature of our human nature. It follows from the way our nervous system works, it follows from the way that multiple parts of our brain work in concert to define who we are. Exercises like this are very useful in helping us to achieve this harmony, as they help us to distance ourselves from the contradictions of our inner voices, to look at them from this distance with childlike curiosity and interest, and to embrace them with compassion, giving them space to express themselves and their needs.

This practice helps us to integrate our self-critical part into the whole of our being.

The self-critical part of us is full of contradictions: in the long run it is harmful to us, even though it is meant to help us. It wants to maintain our self-esteem, our social esteem, our faith in the trustworthiness and goodwill of others and in the safety and justice of the world, to motivate us to achieve our goals and to save us from the dangers that come from within and without.

Instead of aggressively attacking or identifying with him, we can begin to learn how to relate to him with compassion. Our imagination can help us in this process.

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We can imagine a stage with three actors on it. We can even give them names. We can imagine in as much detail as we can what they look like, their posture, their tone of voice, their movements, their facial expressions, their gestures.

In the first scene, two characters appear. One is the criticised self with its limitations, flaws and shortcomings. We can imagine him on stage. The other is our critical self. We can imagine that our critical self begins to berate our criticized self. We can hear his words, his tone of voice, see his movements, his facial expressions. If it helps, we can even act it out or draw it. Once he's in character, we can ask him how he feels.

Then we can imagine our criticised self, we can feel what it was like for them to hear the criticism. We can look at his posture, his facial expression. We can ask how he feels and what he would say to the critic. If it helps, we can even pretend or draw him or her. We can even put out chairs and when we sit in one of them, we can act out one of our inner characters, recording his posture, his movements, saying his words out loud. We can allow them to enter into dialogue, to talk to each other. In the meantime, it is worth listening to how they feel. We can explore the feelings of our critical self. We may be shocked to find that, however strong they may seem, they are in fact suffering deeply.

Then, as a second scene, we can imagine our compassionate self coming into play. First, he sits down next to our critical self and tells him and does to him what our critical self needs here and now. We can observe his posture, his movements, his gestures, his tone of voice. How does all this affect our critical self?

Then our compassionate self turns to our criticised self. What does the criticised self need from you? Let the compassionate self do what the criticized self needs. It could be some kind words, encouragement, or even a touch or a hug. What we feel we need. How does this affect our criticised self?

We can dwell in this experience, allowing the deep insights that come from self-compassion to take hold, to start the healing process.